The pursuit of love, only it’s lip balm and there are zero Nazis

Last summer my friend Jess, my lip product enabler and guiding light, asked me if I’d heard of the REFY Lip Blush.

This kind of product — the allegedly blurred-but-also-balmy-tinted-lip-product-don’t-call-it-a-lipstick — is my holy grail. I live my life in the pursuit of it. And don’t get me wrong, I’ve had a few good experiences on this quest! What we had was real, baby! Before you say “But you said two years ago that you loved the Ilia Balmy Tint!” let me say, I still love the Ilia Balmy Tint! Both Lady and Runaway are in my purse as we speak. But I’m not monogamous with a product like this; I’m forever scouting the room, sleeping with one eye open, always in search of something better. I’m sorry; I don’t know why I’m like this. But there have been so many disappointments in the past that I’m very skeptical now, and sometimes afraid to open my heart and get burned again. You know what, let’s talk about those disappointments and clear the air before we go any further! Please reference this comprehensive 2022 blog post about tinted lip balms, but allow me to address the big two I always hear about:

Glossier Generation G: I’ve tried both the old and new formulations of these, and while the new one isn’t quite as drying, none of the shades do my skin tone any favors. All of their shades make me look like a corpse. Technically they did add Cranberry to their regular lineup and I like it, but it’s not an everyday color for me, it’s more of an I’m Going Out and Wearing Lipstick color. I want the “oh look, it’s just naturally beautiful me, frolicking in this meadow” color.

Violette_FR Bisou Balm: This one is ALL over Instagram so I know you’ve been tempted, but let me be a cautionary tale: it’s so not worth it. It’s so cold and dry, like trying to get blood from a stone. I pressed it so hard against my mouth I actually hurt myself, which is not a cool injury anyone wants to brag about. And even then, barely any color transferred to my lips, and it was drying as hell. I heard they reformulated and have seen a few beauty influencers rave about it but guess what, I’m not falling for this gag twice. I’m not paying France $60 to be a dumbass when I can do it on my own for free!

Which brings us back to Jess and the REFY Lip Blush. We were both wary of some online reviews about color in the photos and packaging, but decided to go for it anyway. (Exact quote: “You can’t scare me! I’ve wasted $40 on MUCH dumber things.”) The gamble paid off because REFY Lip Blush is exactly what I wanted from all of these products. They’re incredibly smooth and even somehow make my lips look smoother than they are? The application actually looks blotted and muted, not just scant or patchy. The color is vibrant yet subtle. It glides on beautifully (or dabs, if that’s what you want), feeling cushy but not shiny or moisturizing like the Ilia Balmy Tint. And the shades look good with my skin tone! I own Orchid, Wine, and Canyon. I wear Orchid and Wine almost daily, and they’re very similar – Orchid maybe more punchy for the summer and Wine a smidge deeper for the fall/winter. I also own Canyon but it’s more of a nighttime winter shade for me. Here are some swatches if you are into that sort of thing (I am):

And now they’re available at Sephora so you don’t have to scrutinize and compare internet photos like a forensic scientist trying to solve a crime.

I still can’t believe someone finally did it! They nailed a blurred balm, those magnificent bastards! 

Just to be clear, this does not mean I’m going to stop looking.